"We're totes Over..."

Last night on the first episode of the season finale of Kourtney and Kim Take New York it was blatantly apparent that Kris Humphries and Kim Kardashian’s marriage was doomed.  (Which by the way, since when do you get two episodes for a season finale?) Wouldn’t the second to last episode count as the regular season? Is this just Kris Jenner’s way of infiltrating our brains and turning them into mush so the public remains helplessly infatuated with her family? But on last evening’s episode I was pleasingly surprised with Kris Humphries’ totally-fed-up-with-Kim’s-shit attitude.

It’s evident that Kim’s kamp is focused on making Kris’ ill treatment of Kim responsible for the split, which makes these last few episodes worth watching. Last night Kris’ sister Kaela came to visit from Minnesota and it was a huge inconvenience for Kim’s busy schedule.  Kim purposefully avoided Kaela to keep her from picking up on the mounting tension between Kris and Kim. Kaela seemed a little confused that Kim didn’t want to spend time with her husband and sister in law. Poor thing, doesn’t understand that no one else on the planet matters to the Kardashians, except for the Kardashians.

At one point Kris argued with Kim that she didn’t make any time for anyone else but her family, but it was hard to ignore the distraction of Kim’s mammoth breasts. Clearly her lady lumps were contemplating an Armenian style nip slip, edging closer and closer the camera.  Kris seemed appalled that they were, “so, so, out”, which they were. They seemed much larger than normal and veiny, like she was breastfeeding the Gosselin children or something.

Finally, Kim decided to meet with the psychic medium John Edward who just happened to have an opening for Kim on the 8^th anniversary of Kim’s father’s passing. It was during the phony bologna session that things got weird. John Edward communicated that Kim’s father had a pulled groin muscle and that Kris was a dirty cheating skank during their marriage? Okay, maybe it that wasn’t exactly how it went, but close enough. Kim miraculously discovered that divorce was in her future and shared her thoughts with sister Kourtney. “I feel like I got into this too fast and I don’t want to be married anymore.” Like, totally.

Kim filed for divorce on October 31^st of last year, should we be ashamed that this is still in the news?